Another Day....

Before my old age take place, I remember the first time i met him outside club was when I send the club sandwiches. He was on duty and he was back at based having his lunch, and there i thought he didnt eat yet. I decided t dropped the sandwiches with fifi and go off, which he ?speed to there and convince me not to leave there. I saw him parking his car and walked over to my side. That was the first time i saw him wearing uniform, and he was cute. He leaned over the driver's window, and was talking to me.

From his body language, it say almost everything that he is inclined or interested in me. I was like oops...... But guess what, he didnt eat it until the end of the shift or before he met me....

Vagely, I remember while I was out having dinner and drinking session with Fehrin, he msg me and tried to test out if I am interested to join them for movie. I was a bit interested but not a must... The irritating part he ask me how when I told him that I am still drinking with my friend. He hesitate but i got a feeling that he wants me to be there. And I decided to force him to make decision, I told him if u want to go then i go, if not is ok... And true enough, finally, he make a decision. With the alcohol in my blood, I drove Fehrin back to pasir ris then back to town.

I msg him, then he came out to pick me. While watching the movie, he was leaning to my side, and always gently covering me with my shawl, and his hand will gently slide over my right hand. From the touch, I realise something was even wrong. He kept on asking me to lean over to his side which i am like " so much space "

After the movie, they took one thousand and one minutes to decide where to go... He fb, and say he wanted a mermaid, oh well it was a pretty English mermaid, Serena from "Pirates of the Carribean " Finally, they decided to go to starbucks over at scotts. And everybody was driving so slowly... zzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZz....

Almost everybody was playing iphone and playing games, he was siting beside me, trying to strike conversation but have nothing to talk to me.... Haiz......

The end of the long and suffering chapter.

So What's new for the last 3 weeks ? Nothing much.... Suppose to be on leave, but guess, ya still being bugged...



Finally, we did close the joint bank account, transer the singtel's line to his name. So basically, left the house and the car.. Car is mostly to sell, only need to collect the stall stuffs from him. I am paying for his expenses, which he just throw and leave it to me. The house, think is in the process of cancelling, but no news yet.

Is a relief to let it go, the long end emotional stress.... Maybe, they were right, I should have let it go long time ago.


No matter how sweet the love is or was, will turn ugly and end.

Floorball Game.

Yesterday, after contemplating whether to go for Tango Practica or Floorball with the church People.... I wanted both, but can only chose one due to the timing. So ya, eventually went for the floorball to do some cardiovascular, I would think Tango will be more on conditioning...... I need to lose weight !!!

I had never play Floorball before, only know it similar to hockey. It was not just sport but fellowship with the rest which i never had chance probably for the last 10 years. As usual, feel that they somehow or rather will be late...... And then, it transform to a place where we can play....

I told myself, I must play the game aggressive, not like when in RTO... I must be aggressive and do my Personal Best.... Be in anywhere..... is true, think during the first game, after 1-2 min, i was like SOB..... But then, I still carry on... I knew I can..... While playing half way through the session, while I heard then say." Just shoot !" I just wacked and looked infront, and the ball hit the goal keeper's chin and it went in, GOAL ! I was contended, but still, i never give up, i continue the game, be it attacker, defender, goal keeper.....

It feel good to sweat, unlike at RTO, probably just 2 hours and you do need to rotate, and there are people who are really competitive... so it just make the game like hmm... I like sports, especially games, and I like it with sportsmanship, not like when u want the opponent to die... Is like guys who smack hard at girl like at beach volleyball... And I like it when I can save the smack ( of course, damn painful lah ) .. Is like, "Nice", whether it goes in anot... But at least I know, I am not as weak as you think I am. I miss beach Volleyball...

The after effect of floor ball, back pain especially the lower back, and slight on the right upper arms... At least I am not like someone, who has almost pain all over their body. And i did had a good rest.... First, it was badminton, then BBQ, then now floor ball. what else, heard is captain's ball............

Amazing Saturday

Something interesting today ( i mean saturday )

Be in the right place and you prosper....

Have you ever see a fish swimming in the water, and feel that is happy....
What happen if you put the fish on the bed..?.

If you are in the right place. u feel happy and things will be fine ......



While talking to Isaac HO, and asking him for guidance, He told me my embrace was good..He say i am stable and relax.and i have my own style. lol.. probably only dancing with him. But my walking backwards needs improvement... He say that we should go for regional festival then go BA. And like what his thinking is, no matter how prepare you are, when you go BA u still hve culture shock...So is better to go there earlier, and to dance better.. Unlike some people thinking who think that u must prepare for long to go there.

While dancing with him yesterday, I was alive, dancing with him is like amazing, no stress.. Without active dancing in milonga and lack of practica for 2/12, I manage to hold myself and dance like what i was lead... I was able to support myself. ochos and pivot and giro, and turn and turn..... His return just spark me back a little which is good...

I had a very random and sudden thoughts, I wish to sell the car, and if I have the profits, I book a ticket to BA, Argentina to learn Dancing and to stay there to clear my mind..... I wish to go there alone or at least with someone that is bearable, meaning not irritating.... I want to be like Isaac, who learn dancing like 10 hours... I forsee that I will sli down tremendously... The amount i pay marie france is worth more there...

It was an enjoyable farewell dinner with Isaac..before he head off to BA again. Knowing more stories about people, he is sure one of the people that can read me.... :-)

While talking yesterday, I told him if i am succesful ( in work or dancing ) cause u made me.. missing u from half of the world, just maybe make me want to be with u more.

what touches me was, i am not pretty, i am not slim, i am neither soft or caringbut u love me for who am

Brand New Day

I wanted to write something, probably about myself, but then I flip through the photo and I dun know what to type. I read through my old blog post and I still dun know what to type.

I suddenly got a urge to type something....that is so close yet a bit far

How we met : Inside club ( I hardly go club and i don't even go around knowing people )

Then I flew to bali on the very next day, he added me on fb. I didn't even know who is him, only know we a mutual friend. While I was at Bali, I was talking to my friend, not knowing that he tried to sound for my phone no, in the excuse of having the dancing video.. ( actually, i feel the most easiest way to break ice, is to have camera and go around n take pic or video, it would be better if u r a good photographer ).

After i came back, while at home, I was actually talking to 3 different people from the same team at one go. He was one of them. On the pretext of leaving the house, he left his contact for me... ( WTH, who leave numbers for financial planner? lol)... Somehow or what, i feel he got whats app, and true enough...we texted a while, he say it was boys night out ( i was waiting for him to chio me out loh, angry! ) then he say hp low batt ( dun know how true )then on and off , we have been whats-apping since then.

One friday night, to celebrate for big boss's bdae, I actually dress up nicely to the dinner... While at the dinner, I actually received WA msg from him, and he ask me to go club..I was like, I am all dress up and in town, why not..... But people that i know was not going, and accordig to him, they are not going so early, as usual... Then i ended dinner at 2200hrs, and waited.. Seriously, i didnt trust whether they going, so i went back home. With my nice make up, i doze off while waiting, trying not to be desperately by texting people. Woke up at 0000hrs with the make up, text him, and guess what, HE WAS THERE AT ARENA liao, without teling me.. NOT SINCERE one... Hack lah, whatever, since i got make up......

I didnt wanted to drink, but since it was an invitation.. ok loh.. ( i bet he didn't know what he got himself into. lol ) So i pour one glass, cheer, and another one, and the 3rd one..... I told him, my theory to drink with me is 3 glasses at one go then rest 5 ming, 3 glasses 5 min.. 3/5/3/5/3...at the end of 30 min, He posted 9th glass in 30 min.. I was like ok mah..... just quench thirst a bit... Then he goes, needing to smoke with the fast travelling alcohol..... then with the drama show put up by jeremy....

I went back the club drinking with the boys.... and i was still not high..... hmmm... half way through, i decided to leave, cause i feel something was a bit wrong.... i texted him, and he said that he should send me to the taxi, i said it was ok.... When he worked up that day, He text me, and then he hinted that we should hang out one day, with just that 2 of us.. I was like " hmmm.... ok" what else to say.... I was like see how.. then in fb, posted something , and he was cheeky, and everybody goes like kinky...

Dun recall if it was the same day or what... He texted me, he was alone, with the parents taking his car, he subtle tried to ask me out for dinner with him. Guess what ? The spicy revengful me, say no, cause he never jio me when i wanted to go out.. Hmmm... i rather stay home too....with him eating his instant noodle.YEAH, revenge is sweet !

He actually time the number of minutes that I was missed by him, actually I was having my tango practica... And when it ended, i text him, he told me was 112 min...i was like ok..hmmm.... even more weird..... my guess, he is falling, falling for me....

One day duty, while he was at work, he texted me and say he had craving for club sandwich. I say if he see one, will he eat?, i went all the way to search for it online, snap a pic and send it to him... Can see cannot eat... lol..... Well, at least it cheer him abit..... Then had his mood swing and every body in the work place is annoying him.In the middle of nowhere at big splash, I was searching high and low for a club sandwich under the hot sun..... And it was so diificult, and i went for the next best alternative, Starbucks...... with teh ice from teh tarik..... And send it over to eunos npp when fifi is, and he can drop by and pick it up...It was a anti-mood swing sandwiches to cheer him up, which he didnt eat till like after work.*roll eyes.

That day, after being touched by the sandwich, he tried to ask me out for dinner, which i say ok.. He picked me up, and something interested happen, and so i ask him whether are you friday, saturday or sunday.. He laughed......

Pleasant Surprise

Last Sunday, after shopping for Jolene's present, and since I was late for practica so i didnt go, and then meet the rest at Minds cafe. Then i tried very hard to prepare the cake in the tight space cause i was just 2 seat away from her. I had to call the other people on the other side to divert her attention then can the cake appear we cut the cake first...

Thank God, she love the present that i chose....lol.......

Came was Monday, when I had my follow up appointment at KKH cause of my ? hormone imbalance... I told my boss i going appt and i will be on MC.Know my boss ask me what again.... He say he didnt know my appt timing and why am i Taking mc... I told him 1030hrs, and the last i went, it took me half a day..... He say lt him know by 12oo if not fine 30bucks.... Didnt i say, i will be on mc already.... From fever and drowsy , want me to work, mc also need to work and i am expected to be pink of health...

While at KKH, when they tried to verify the NOK, i was like erm... My parent didnt even know that i have some bleeding problem.. I had to change, since that idiot had left and uncontactable. And when they asked, I was like erm, and I looked at GZ, and ask him, if i can put him as the nok.. ( *shy )...

Then they send me to take BP and weight, before I went in, the nurse said,"do you want to pass your stuffs to fiance ?" *faintz, i guess no explantion save trouble.... I feel preggy based on things they ask me to do, although i look preggy but i was on follow up check up.... My BP was abit on the high side.... 140/90 leh.....

After some thinking and some prayers, it just felt right that I go part time, and explore some thing else again..... Right in the first place, it wasnt my choice, cause he was the one they want to recruit not me, I was only the consolation prize..... But i do realise the importance of financial planning, but I hate my team seriously.. Bali's "memories" came back to me, how i was left alone after the dance, and how when my boss rushed back to have massage then to wait a little for me.. I lucky my lucky star, I make it back in one piece.. I feel so like crying....

Yesterday, after much surprise, Isaac is back....It was defintely a pleasant one.... After not actively dancing for 2 months, I went back to milonga, and my one and only dance was with Isaac.... Argh... feel so stress.. definately feel like a mid-term test... But i feel that, my standard not so good leh as compare to others... Oh well, as long as it dancing with isaac..... Nothing really matter...

We had a good supper with him, then they updated him about the past few months..... Then we came to the lover and partner topic... Interesting.....Just few hours before he talked to us, I had the sudden urge to be like Isaac, and fly to BA for few months... To travel and dance just like what Isaac did before... To clear my mind, and to dance, and i am very sure i will be skinny when i come back...lol.. free slimming programme...

we were talking about lovers and partner. what is a lover and what is a partner... a lover is passionate yet lonely... a partner life is stable but boring...... I totally agree... He say that I am a lover, and i agree...

Tree Top Walk

This morning, RTO had our organisation Health day at Tree top walk... Walking up so early is still abit ot killer, but not as bad as last time since I have to wake up so early everyday.... But to reach there at 0830hrs is like argh... lucky is a saturday so no ERP, and is FREE parking.. cheapskate, but I am a Singaporean.. Happy National Day !

Something, I learn from the trekking... they have already pre-empt that the journey will be physical. never expect it... they say is going to take like 3-4 hours.. I was like fxxk... I have tired to mentally prepare myself....

what have i go myself into ..... Is like sweating..... The uneven terrain, the 40 degree of up slope, the stairs up and down....it was really like mind over body.. 10years back, i will be like no problem.... after stepping into the working life.... irregular exercise, chilling out and lack of stamina.... make me feel old..... i am suppose to be a sportswoman..

Mun Yee , Jody , Mollie

As I was walking back way in front of the group, I finally get my own peace to appreciate God's work and to have some thinking. Life is almost like the tree top walk, there are rocky time, there are time whereby u need extra energy to go up the slope, there are time where u can relax..... No matter how tough the journey, u just got to bite the teeth and continue the journey, and just ignore what other people have to say along the way....(e.g i heard people talking about family planning... i was like ok.... my age, ya i am suppose to but things just doesnt goes ur way )

The journey of course was completed by yourself and not by other people. They can't walk for you.. In the begining of the Journey, some people start and accompany you, probably after sometimes, lack of stamina and all.. They fall back, and u just got to walk alone.. Probably as a paramedic-trained, i am used to be alone, cause nobody ever gonna give me solution....

I just walked with mollie and MY, and waited for the rest...... It was ok, guess more on dehydration.. Needed to rest since afternoon till like 2030hrs.....My weak ankle is on strike again...

The sadness in me

Why is it that when I am in my car, then I start to cry.. It is like what Joe say, I can only be myself when I am inside my car. I cry alot these few days, while driving, to work, from work or out......

I feel sad, feel lousy.. That last 2 years I had achieve nothing much.. I gain so called experience in life and in business.. True, nothing is easy...... I feel so depress, yet due to the nature of my work, i cant broadcast or tell people.. If people who catch it, they catch it, if not, not much thing i can do also..

I know i shouldnt.. I just cant help it much..... I can be lost too.... Things seem achieveble, yet i cant focus.. I hate it

Happy Weekend

Last weekend, was fantastic....... It was one of the happy weekend of the year..... I was showed with love and happiness....... I can't be bother to think of anything.. Every seconds was so precious, after being busy for few weeks .... Many night, was spend bath and KO straight...

Had dinner at Breko on Wednesday
no bad, cozy envirnoment, and food was not bad...

Had modesto at vivo on thursday for dinner..


Italian food... something that i miss since milan trip.... But when i was there, didnt had chance to enjoy it.... but now.. craving for it so much..

How could u miss the tiramisu, oh well, some people dont even know that is authetic from italy.. I miss those in italy, is so soft that it just melt in the mouth.

Had pizza @ Wala on friday

In the afternoon, went to mfm with bobo, then went to starbuck for coffee.. and is her way of making Jody's day... and she also say i put on weight.. ya man.. for the last 2 months, suddenly again. then she bought me to central to take her documents..... Miss the coding and all, the case...

went with GZ, to wala..... Not in such a mood to drink, oh well, but was hungry.. Guess what, hawallian pizza, haiz, sad memories...... haiz...

saturday dinner @ the ship, NEX

Omg.. sucks, dun try... no worth it...

sunday dinner@ the little fish, NEX

So much food, how not to be fat and happy.....


I was out at WALA last friday, instead of Haji lane, instead of playing some stupid game at some cafe..... I am not saying anything, is just the different way I chill........ Although is a bit far, but it was worth it.... I guess the hang out place on friday is WALA... lol... :-)

Can u imagine, I was out playing badminton with church people and i did not go for dancing..... lol.... need to sweat and lose some weight... It was kinda of last minute, cause they only invited me to the badminton after the service.... But It was a good work out, as well as a good fellowship.. I believe, we all need our own personal time......

Probably, in the asian context, if you are on the bigger side, you hardly have people to dance with you.... That's why i rather lose weight... For the argentians, if you are not a good dancer, they wont dance with you.. In the korean, if the guys sucks, the ladies wont dance with them.....



Oh well, i guess i am really not a morning person... I was driving to church, trying to find a parking lot.. Guess what, i mount the kern and scratch badly my left side skirt... Ouch... what else can I do...... Haiz... When you r down, murphy's law....